I think you’re a contra…

…but i don’t actually know what that means.  I think Vampire Weekend is just awesome.  Freakin’ sweet actually.  The new album Contra has a bunch of great stuff on it.  Songs like “Holiday” “California English” “Cousins” “Horchatta” – all interestingly clever melodies.  However, the title song “Contra”, is just terrible.  It’s slow and it doesn’t pick up.  Its a lot of weird high pitched runs, and I don’t even know what a Contra is.

Bryan finally moved out.  He had until the end of C-term to move out (his request) but he already had a place to move into since about two weeks ago.  Would you like to hear what the final straw was?   haha, no?  well, I’m a tell you anyway bitch!

Why was he being kicked out in the first place?  Having people over without asking permission and fucking up the common spaces (and in general being a dick).  What could have happened to make his upheaval from the household occur at an earlier date?  Having a person over without asking permission and fucking her up in her “uncommon” spaces.  yes i know, very clever of me.

Here’s how it went:  Emily, Sam, Justin and me were playing videogames until about 2:00.  Then ‘the party’ wound down a bit and sam went to bed whilst Justin waited for the snap van to come and pick him up.  It arrived and he went out the door.  I locked the door behind him.  A minute later the doorbell rings and luckily (i thought) i was still in the kitchen and i could let justin back in because he forgot something important.  I open the door and in comes a drunk-ass Bryan, back from a ‘sex on the beach’ party.  He gelled his hair up, and wore a wife-beater/swimtrunk combo outfit.  Looked like a tool.  And who does he bring back with him?  Some hoochie.  She shakes mine and emily’s hand and says her name is danielle except she shakes my left hand with her left hand upside-down.  She was drunk.  Emily says to Bryan that he can’t have her over and he puts on a drunken “whatever i’m a do what i want” attitude.  He brings her up to his room (around 2:30) and he starts talking shit to his chick about me and emily.  i hear danielle say “man, your roommates are assholes.”  The whole night I have to hold back Emily from barging in and kicking that girl out.  They start having ‘the sex’ and we can hear everything.  It lasts ~10mins.  I finally go to sleep at ~4 am.  Wake up in the morning and Bryan leaves the girl in his room for nearly 20 minutes as he goes to get his car from wherever its parked so he can drive it back to the house and pick the girl up and drive her wherever she lives (probably a brothel).  Emily calls her father and everyone decides its time for the kid to be kicked out.  Enough is enough (is enough i can’t go on i can’t go on no no no!).  that was a family guy reference if you were wondering.

Now our friend Anton is replacing Bryan next year.  In the meantime…..I have my own bathroom for the first time in my whole life!


ps.  I watch a lot of videos on collegehumor.com.   This is an old spice commercial that i think is funny.



2 Responses to “I think you’re a contra…”

  1. Mister Man Says:

    Fucking up her “uncommon” spaces?

    I’m pretty sure they are very much so common.

    OH!!! snap. 🙂

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